It's official.....this week is SO not my favorite!
Yesterday I "took the day off" and decided that it was a PJ and movie sort of day. I laid around hoped that some of my favorite feel good movies would snap me out of the funk I'd been in.
Do you ever have those days....or weeks...where you just can't seem to get the hang of forward motion?
I don't have anything to be deeply depressed over (which my sweet husband reminds me of frequently). We have a home, we have food, everyone is generally in good health, the lights and water work, we have clothes to wear (and super cute ones too!), we have a vehicle to take us where we need to go, and money to keep gas in the tank.
Honestly, (and listen closely because I don't say this often) I was feeling selfish.
There have been some amazing things happening in the life of our church. God has been moving in an undeniable way.
But, in the midst of this, I've been feeling kind of invisible. Not only to God, but to everyone else.
Right now we're in a season where God is teaching us (O.K., it's probably just me) to REALLY trust him. He is proving over and over again that he can be trusted and that we have nothing to fear.
This week I've been hopelessly human. I have not only been speaking my soul into submission, but practically having to beat it with a stick!
The first Wednesday of every month our church gathers together to pray. This past Wednesday was a little different because our pastor had called us to also fast, believing that God was going to reveal himself in an incredible and new way.
All day long, on the church's Facebook page, were stories of how God had shown who he really is. I went through the day battling one thing after another and struggled with 'rejoicing with those who rejoice.'
Evening rolled around and we gathered together to pray. I honestly wasn't feeling it...which was the exact reason I dragged my tail there. It was a sweet time of worship, and many people brought every ounce of faith that they had that God was going to move. I believe that he is.....but I just couldn't get my soul to get on board.
Yesterday, after the kiddos got home, I turned on Alice in Wonderland (the new Tim Burton version).
I love that movie :D
It's crazy, and dark, and weird, and Ann Hathaway cracks me up.
At the end of the movie Alice fights on behalf of the good queen. She acquires a special sword called Vorpal and she sets off to slay the Jabberwocky (the evil queen's dragon champion).
During the entire movie Alice is convinced that she is dreaming....she can't fathom that this is reality because of the sheer madness of it all. She doesn't believe in herself, she doesn't think she has what it takes to slay this beast...it's impossible.
Then she remembers something her father used to say to her...."I believe in as many as six impossible things before breakfast"
She then starts counting the impossible things that she's encountered in Wonderland. The sixth is that she CAN slay the Jabberwocky.....and she does.
Today...I am Alice.
This week I have felt that my situations are impossible.
But I've forgotten that my father has given me a sword to slay the beast.
Today I am believing
I believe God is who he says he is
I believe God will do what he says he will do
I believe that he will never leave or forsake me
I believe that he is the pillar of cloud by day and the pillar of fire by night
I believe that he is guiding my footsteps even though I feel like I'm caught in quicksand
I believe that he has a plan and a purpose for my life
I believe that I am not alone
I believe that he sees me....really sees me
I believe that he is moving
What are you believing God for today?
